DeMan Who Was Not A Man.

Well today I mourn the passing of a fabrication, the death of an identity constructed. I can't say I was proud of it, it's actually quite embarrassing. I refer to it as an it and not a he, because I have this strong conviction that this construct was no man. It was this wimpy, loser stupid girl. I admit I'm a little shocked at it's existence. Even now it's dead and 6 feet under, I'm still somewhat in a state of disbelief. It was a total loser, and I was it.

Interesting week it's been. And let me tell you something about dreams, and it's not the same as that previous post about it. It's a dream of a different kind. Cause this past week, I had a dream. I had a dream where solitude was to be nothing but a memory. I had a dream where me and solitude part ways and I walk into the glorious sunset or somesuch cinematic ending. I had a dream. I no longer do. What a week.

I might actually have been possessed this last week. I've never allowed myself to dream, and as it turned out, it was a mistake. Well dreams are for people who can achieve them. If you never will, why bother dreaming? The burden of expectation on yourself, deluding yourself, and in the end it all works out to naught. If you can achieve them, by all means dream on! Cause I have to admit, the experience was something special. Folly, in retrospect, but does not bliss lie in foolishness? All fools are happy fools.

And here now we've reached the stop where my dreams get off, but the train of my thoughts continue. I'm leaving this station far behind.

Anyway I caught (500) days of summer! I've got to say it's seriously awesome and everyone should watch it cause it's really great. I'm not sure what genre it falls under, maybe love? Probably love, but it's not a romantic sappy sort. It's sort of a.... well it's a pretty light movie yet totally engrossing. There's nothing deeper to it yet it's highly enjoyable. And it's pretty hilarious too, really refreshing movie, at once hopeful yet not. Glad I took the time out to watch it. Gotta love Zooey Deschanel who incidentally is the sister of Bones! It was cool to see my man Dr. Spencer Reid from criminal minds and the lawyer also from bones. And terrifically done by Joseph Gordon-Levitt, I might just check out his back catalogue cause he's really good. Well go for it guys, just 90 minutes off studying, it's worth it.

And from the movie I do recall: People don't realize this, but loneliness is underrated. I Lol'd when I heard that. The couple next to me probably thought I was trying to console meself. It's interesting how the stares I get for being alone no longer make me feel awkward but instead amuse me no end. I should do this more often.

Well enjoy a good day ahead, guys. I know I will.