The Beginning Of Forever/The End Of Yesterday.

Buon giorno. It's been a pretty wild month/2months, so much so that I find it quite impossible to describe in its entirety here. So there won't be an über long post like the one after my french trip, so don't worry aha. Hm. In fact I'm not sure what I wanna talk about here, except that I'm feeling kinda sickly (maybe just fatigued) and am in no mood to do anything else save the excretion of whatever random thoughts I've got jumbled up in my head. So.

Went to Rome with another 3 guys, bittersweet is kinda a gay expression to describe a trip with guys, so I'll go with lukewarm. I guess there are good things and bad to traveling with others, as there are with so many other things (perhaps everything) in life. But still, I think I'd gotten too used to traveling on my own. Some of the things they did, the way they acted towards the locals etc really grated on me. And then you're not as absorbed into the culture of wherever it is you are because there's always these familiar elements (your friends) holding you back. It wasn't all bad though, far from it in fact. Just the mere matter of companionship, having people to discuss the (entirely foreign) menu with, messing around and talking cock etc, was a fun enough experience. Having other people book flights/hotels and craft the itinerary for me was pretty novel as well, and made for a really lazy holiday for me where I pretty much bummed along with the rest.

Couldn't leave it at that so I traveled the rest of Italy on my own, covering Naples, which included Pompeii, Sorrento and Amalfi. Florence, incl. San Gimignano and other bits of the Tuscan countryside. Cinque Terre and Venice. All amazing places, and I can't imagine having not gone to any of those places. That's the immense advantage of not planning anything out in advance. Sure, it usually turns out to cost more than it would have if you pre-book everything, but you miss out on the awesomeness of spontaneity. I had my flight to Rome with the other guys and my flight back from Venice, the rest was pretty piecemeal, random decisions built upon other random decisions.

I didn't know about Sorrento or Amalfi until I was in Naples, so that was a plus. I'd only heard of Cinque Terre from the hostel guy in Naples, which was how I decided to proceed there from Florence. I think that was my favourite place in Italy btw. So if anyone decides to travel Italy, pls try to remember Cinque Terre! Oh and I did meet a girl there too... What's the point of traveling if you don't meet girls srsly? Oke whatever. Of course nothing did develop with said girl, possibly because my handwriting was/is so bad that she will never be able to decipher my email address. Huh.


Okay I was typing that halfway when I stopped for unknown reasons. That was almost a week ago maybe. Now I don't want to continue anymore. So I'll go on about life as it is now, instead of reminiscing aboot an awesome holiday I have, because that makes life now that much more depressing. Huh.

So I've just started work and within a day of reporting I had a Sunday duty. Lifesux believe me. I guess I'll have to work extra hard to regain all the knowledge I've lost over the past 9months, and re-navalize myself. Meh. It's actually not that bad, even fun to some extent, so I don't really mind all that much. Truly shite hours though, and sooooo tiring. Sigh.

On the MRT on thursday night I saw ads for the Singapore Arts Festival which opened on Friday. That's become my latest haunt. I've been there twice since, and have enjoyed a couple of performances, all for free! Friday I was treated to some slapstick comedic action and a dance performance which was brilliant. It was quite well done, and by a local troupe to boot if I'm not wrong, it was quite remarkable. The juxtaposition of the masculine/feminine, the sensuality, well lots of other stuff that I've not seen much cause I've never really watched a dance performance. Certainly a good experience, that.

Today I ate at the festival cafe where the waiters broke into dance halfway through my ice cream. That was fun. Then I looked at kids playing (non-paedophically believe me.) Then curiosity got the better of me and I approached a booth called An Umbrella For 2, or sth like that. It's this thing where they foist an umbrella onto you with headphones, and you're supposed to walk down this route while listening to the MP3 tracks they have prepared. Since it was For 2, I paired up with this random English lady for the more-than-an-hour-long walk. The concept was pretty good, and the overall experience was quite nice, so I'd say it was a successful piece of interactive "art" or whatever its supposed to be labelled as. I must say I felt pretty retarded carrying the umbrella indoors, down escalators, through Citylink etc. I don't think I've garnered so many odd looks and weird stares in a long time, if ever. Only added to the fun though, although getting lost detracted a little bit from it aha.

My new English friend and I then went to watch the main performance (also free ofc) together. It involved horses and a French woman. Well, also a french man, but the first part sufficed to capture my attention. It was pretty cool as well. I don't think I've ever seen showhorses or any performance involving horses, so I was well amazed at how obedient they were. Utterly enjoyable, and there was an unexpectedly delightful bit where they had a sort of fountain show with the figure of a horse galloping, which doesn't really sound so awesome typed out, but was pretty darn awesome.

Almost all the theatre tickets were sold out, to my utter dismay. The moment I saw The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle was showing in the Esplanade I picked up the book and started reading it. Truly diligent. Too bad all the tickets were sold out though, as were Lear Dreaming and some dance/film compilation thing. Never knew Singaporeans were so hungry for the arts, a newbie mistake at the first ever festival I've been aware of. The book has been awesome so far though, so that's a big (Y).

Not so many (Y)s in my life now, at least not that I'm aware of. Within days of coming back to Singapore I'm feeling like a drone already, coming back home in the night (if at all) and performing perfunctory gestures like a bath, small chat with the parents, getting ready for the next day, and not much else before collapsing into bed to recharge my spent batteries. Huh. That's why I wanted to blog today, so that I don't just do the bare minimum upon reaching home, or I'll embark on a cycle that never ends. I can't even muster the energy to ask people out for dinner/supper, which is why I've been hitting the arts festival on my own and eating out alone as well. I had Kungfu Paradise at JCUBE today though, and that was none too shabby for all their ridiculous dish names.

It's times like these though, that I kinda wish I had something to look forward to. Something to snap me out of my tiredness, to break the monotony. It's like I finish work and start wandering around Singapore aimlessly, making random decisions on when and what to eat for dinner, what to do and when to go home. At least there's the arts festival for the moment, but that's ending on the 2nd of June. I might feel kinda lost after it ends haha.

It's not that I feel lost, that I don't. I have objectives to work towards and a number of goals I intend to achieve, but these are all professional ones, entirely work related. They are career-goals, not ones that give me any particular pleasure. Perhaps the word here is duty, that I have a duty to achieve this goals. My friend was just telling me about extrinsic and intrinsic motivations or sth like that, which possibly might apply here. Okay this is me trying to be clever again haha.

I guess what I want is something to look forward to at the end of the day, something beyond the basic things like rest (although I do crave this like a madsman.) or a piping hot dinner. It doesn't have to be anything extravagant even, I guess sometimes even something as small and seemingly insignificant as a message will do. Sometimes I wonder, just what exactly am I working for? Why do I wake up at 5.30am and even consider staying-in, when that's almost counter-intuitive? Meh. I guess it's up to me to sort my life out instead of whining aha. It's just abit of a drag to work without knowing what I'm working for. I could say I'm working for myself and my career, which while perfectly valid, I find to be wholly inadequate. Oh well.

Okay suddenly brain won't work. Need sleep anyways. Goodnight then!