I Deal In Commodities.

I'm nobody special. A businessman whose commodity happens to be that most precious thing known to man, hope. I dispense hope, for a price. Don't ask me if the price is worth it, I'm merely the dealer. (cocked eyebrow, shrug of the shoulders.)

Oh, is that so? I don't give a shit. (slams table, real anger.) Tell me about the first one. No more bullshit.

Well, if you insist. Ah, the first one. Is it not said the first time is always the best? (another slam on the table.) Alright, alright, I'm just recounting. Well the first one, she's what you'd call a two-looker. Someone you look at once, then look again. A real beaut that one. Not terribly bright though. (scoff) Whaddya know, guess what she came in with, self-esteem and image problems. Thought she was fat and ugly. Felt that her life wasn't worth living. Way too easy, to be honest. Some mock sympathy and medical jargon and I had her. She wanted to end her misery, I did.

Shut up. I said no more of that crap. So you confess to it?

Gladly, why should I deny it? She got what she wanted, I was doing her a favour, merely fulfilling her wishes. (barely restrained fury) Okay, calm down. I'll tell you want you want to hear. The second one. Oh, one to make you weep. Like a greek tragic it was. Young lad, barely out of his teens if I remember correctly. He was seeking to escape all those (faint smile) crushing issues all young people face. Out of luck and out of love, he was snared by my promises of a solution to all his problems. I offered him hope, and he eagerly grabbed it. Oh, I asked him. Do you want a way out? No prizes for guessing what he said. I gave it to him.

(grunt) Okay that will be all for today. (gets up to leave) I'll see you in cou-

Why so hasty? Perhaps you see more than a little sense in what I'm saying? I'm not a murderer, God forbid. I'm a businessman. I give people what they want. I'm sure it doesn't shock you how many people want what I can give. Truly it doesn't. Who would pass up the chance to be free of all cares? I'm not surprised I got caught, I'm surprised you would want me caught. I'm doing the world a service. Deep inside, everyone wants to die. They just haven't come to that conclusion yet. Maybe I'm ahead of the curve, or jumping the gun a little bit. But ultimately, is what I'm doing so wrong? Ending years of misery and pain that life without fail dishes out. Tell me what's wrong with that. (silence) You can't. That will be all for today, this was taxing. And may I have a glass of water on your way out?

(silence. door slams. silence again.)


I don't know what else to write. It wasn't one of the stories I planned to write, although I had one in mind about a dealer of hope. Wasn't this though, I don't know how it came about. Maybe it's the Criminal Minds (4 seasons of it) coming through. Well it's not particularly good. I don't like it myself. I think it's supposed to be a Hannibal-Joker-like murderer but it's pretty hard to portray without using any descriptive words. The idea itself isn't very strong. Not well done.

Anyway I caught Up the other day. Well I guess it wasn't exactly a very timely moment to watch it, given the circumstance. I went in with high expectations, and still loved it. I don't know what I was expecting, but the show was unexpectedly touching. It's such a sincere and heartfelt show, really moving at parts. Maybe some people go in with the notion that all cartoons have to be retardedly funny or were put off by the simple plot. I like simple, simple is good. It's an honest film that (I think) isn't just out to rake in the money with cheap laughs and cheap thrills. Awesome show.

I want to watch District 9 and Moon. What a relief, I thought Moon ended it's run already cause I read about it a few months back. But it's about to be released soon yey. And Inglorious Basterds. Definitely. I have 30 dollars stowed away, there's no excuse not to watch these movies.

Went to the Tea Party to celebrate Anjo's birthday. Such good food, and it was free to boot. Didn't expect to not pay, but what a pleasant surprise. Played Taboo (Singapore version), was pretty fun.

I don't know why I'm not sleeping, my eye bags are massive but it's 6am already. I indulged in some Super Smash Bros and suffice to say I'm a Kirby legend. Even with the lousy keyboard I managed to win everyone. Was not so good with Pikachu though. I recommend the game to everyone, it's serious fun. Yeah yeah. mega-nerd playing dota and games with Mario and Pikachu. YEY.

I did go for a walk eventually. Thursday or Wednesday night, when the skies were being hesitant. Like ai-mai ai-mai want to rain don't want to rain like that. So I thought at least it's not so hot, so I embarked on the journey in my school pants and flipflops. 2 hours later, I returned home feeling so much better. You know sometimes you have too much restless energy and dota just can't cut it? It's a horrible sensation, that. But I felt so at peace with myself and the world in general after the walk. Therapeutic totally.

Wtshit my brother woke up. He's never slept for less than 15 hours on a weekend or holiday I think. That's got me worried I'm ending my post. Ta-ta.