Purely China. 求是实验中学

Yes, it's been ages. Believe me when I say I've been much too busy to blog, even though I'd been meaning to ever since I came back from China. I'm afraid the memories might have faded away, the edge taken off, but I'll try as best I can to replicate the feelings that I wanted to blog about when I returned. Well, other than that, there's been a host of other things that I've been doing lately, I am a busy man!

Okay, let's try this chronologically. Well, obviously only the significant stuff, which I myself want to remember. Hmm. Since my last post..... lotsa birthdays, as is expected in the dreaded June/July period. Tests probably outnumber birthdays, and are a thousandfold more dreadful. Out of the tests in these few painfully long weeks, I don't think I scored well in any of them. Am not gonna embarrass myself with the actual results here.

A huge chunk of June was preparation for the Zhejiang trip. Well, with hindsight, almost all the preparation done was in vain. But at least learning was done in the process. Because in China, everything was just impromptu and rushed, practically everything we had prepared for failed to materialize, and it was all just on the spot stuff.

Yep, time to blog about China. I knew an overseas trip would definitely be enriching, but I did not expect this level of.... accomplishment. Start from the basics, lest I ever need to refresh my memory. We went to Qiu Shi Experimental School 桐乡求是实验中学, at least I think that's the Chinese version. Upon reaching, we had our first look at their so-called leaders, and had to teach them some noob cheers for some basketball tournament thing. Nothing much, boring day. On the next day, we had to go down to some semi-rural school on the outskirts of the city. We were supposed to do classroom interaction and teach the kids there cheers. The kids there were extremely receptive and warm, but I screwed up. It didn't help that the other JJ fellow in the classroom was Hui Mui, who's quite a pain to work with. I couldn't work with her at all, and I was just bad in the classroom on that day. At least a few of the Qiushi leaders managed to look quite promising despite my failures.

Next day, we went back to the school again. The children recognized us and seemed pretty happy to see us again. They were damn excited about what games we were going to conduct and what songs we were gonna teach them. That was damn heartening, and since I had by then found out what exactly we were supposed to do inside the classrooms, it was great, I felt. I managed to let 2 of the more outstanding leaders take charge of the class and conduct the activities, only stepping in for comic effect.

And then, we had to meet the 112 supposed leaders. Okay, the plan was this. 20 of us, were supposed to be advisors. The 28 leaders, the planning comm. The 112 leaders, the facilitators. Obviously, that was a cock up. The "leaders" were supposed to be so capable just because they had half a day's more experience than the rest -.- Absolute disaster. What happened eventually was that the PC became the OGLs while only a few of the supposed leaders helped them. Yep, 700 campers and 28 OGLs.

Okay so, we had very little time to actually do anything with the 112 leaders. They came in at like in the afternoon, we played icebreaker games, and taught them some cheers. Just like campers. Then, we had very little time with which to tell them and impact upon them their roles, basically just telling them that they were leaders among the campers. Really, really lame. Which set the tone for the orientation lah. I can't recall in detail what we did with those 112 people on that day, nothing much really.

D-Day, first day of the orientation. Okay, to compound the bullshit, I was family head. Yep, in China, with razak as my assistant. VHUT DA? I think, that was kind of ridiculous. I was under-prepared and my assistant fam head couldn't help me much. Chinese, chinese, and more chinese man. Terrible. I did not want to be family head, but I could not refuse.

Too much family time, too little activities, too little cheers to teach. Little or no enthusiasm from the kids. My PC worked extremely hard, yes, but did not manage to control them. I got angry many times, up on my puny little ping-pong table. Oh, and it once collapsed under me, thankfully Shen Yi (who was up there with me) was not injured. I tried everything I could, but there were only like, 3 different cheers we could use. Games, got boring after a while. Claps were overused, and yes, only 3 or 4 of them anyway. Razak tried extremely hard to help from on the ground, but he cannot speak chinese. Ping Fan lost her voice that day. All of them did what they could, but there were only what, 4 of them? Yu Yang had to do admin and Wu Yi had some emcee thing probably. Lol, it was so terrible, after the family times, me and razak would just shout out vulgarities cause we were so damn frustrated and pissed off. Like, "CB WTF LAH! NB SIA! Really DAMN CB SIA EFF!"

SSS was not good too, the emcees didn't do well. Then, a masterstroke from Mr Leow. Emo-time. He spoke to the family heads, and told us to tell the PCs to tell the campers what they've done so far and their feelings. I think Mr Leow is an excellent manipulator, the way he does things. Basically, that was one helluva night. I cried, too. Had not done that in a VERY long time.

After SSS, the kids were sent back to their classrooms. The PCs proceeded to do what we told them to do. But they did not know how to do it properly, like Lu Xin's class, she was actually laughing along with them -.- That's where I came in, and owned those little kids. In all my life, I have never spoken so eloquently in chinese. I managed to move, 150 people to tears. I managed to extol the qualities of the PC so well that each class broke down, and of course, the PC themselves broke down. Yeah, what a night. Entering each class, saying different things in each class. I think, moments like those, are what being a leader is all about. Leaders are nothing if not for the people they lead. And that night was the best experience I have ever had, in terms of seeing the impact on the campers themselves. Each classroom has it's own story, 14 classes. Each leader, his/her own frustrations and problems. And it's all about the people element, that makes everything worthwhile. Sounds tacky and cliched, but that's the truth and what I went to China for. To feel each of their frustrations while speaking to the class, what they've gone through and what they've sacrificed. The PC, they're special, and they're amazing.

When I had done with my classes, the sense of satisfaction was just.. sweet. After all that the PC had gone through that day, to see that the classes actually acknowledge it, even though only after being scolded, was just shiok. So I sent my PC back to the command centre, and went to check on other classes. And I saw a scene which actually made me tear, seriously, like some scene out of a movie. So I was walking around, when I saw 2 of the PCs outside their class crying. As I was walking over to them, their whole class came running out of the classroom crying, and in one voice, said "对不起姐姐!" My goodness, I was so shocked at the entire scene, it was damn touching. Then I had quite a lengthy talk with the 2 of them, until we were reminded to go back to the command centre. And that emo-session just changed the whole day, not only, the whole camp. Truly a masterstroke by a master manipulator.

The next day was, comparatively, a breeze. The campers co-operated most of the time, and the influence the leaders had on the campers was much greater than before. We started the day with the treasure hunting game, and that was fun. Very messy, but it was fun. Our job was to roam about the place, looking for missing campers and missing classes. And it was a great opportunity to look at how the PC interacted with the campers. Lunch, then the China Kinetic Warfare. Our stations were spread far and wide around the school, and it was an excellent atmosphere. We could have sustained the game for very long, and it would have been great, but we had to push forward everything due to some basketball game going on in the indoor stadium. My station was only played once -.- I prepare everything and in the end played for just 5 minutes lor, then gao dim alr. Damn suay, I think Chris and Jacelyn must have been pretty upset man. They plan so long, then in the end we had to cut it short even though it was doing great. The finale wasn't so great, and much of it was because of the stupid gathering place. 700 people had to squeeze in some tiny canteen. I cannot recall if there was AVAC support, if there was it wasn't good. It was hot in there, squeezy and humid. And all we were doing was some lame rah-rah session, which I think flopped.

Then after that then move into the stadium for some telematch finale. It took way too long, because of the stupid fishing thing. But it was average lah, I believe the crowd got tired after a while. And oh the basketball match was after our finale thing, which was why we had to push everything forward, unfortunately.

Oh yes, it was family time before and after the KW. Before, was to rah-rah my family about the KW, and after, about the Qiushi Night. The one pre-KW was pure bullshit. I was like, we're second in the standings, not so far from the number one, but number three and four are quite close. Then some more bullshit about how if they cheer loudly, they get more points and if they talk while I'm talking I will deduct points. Lol, bullshit like that man, and they believed everything. Super useful. Of course la, every family head told their family that they were number two -.- But that one was not so bad, I think I did pretty well.

Ah, but the one after the KW was excellent. I was alone cause razak went to prepare for the night. Plus the PC from SCDC had to go off too. So there were like, me and 3 PCs. But I think I did a damn wonderful job lah, seriously. First I did some rah-rah thing, very standard one. Then I let them sit in their own circles around the ping pong place. Quite amazingly they took damn long to understand what a circle was supposed to look like -.- After that, I just randomly did stuff and it was damn good. I did like, cheer competition, song-singing and lecturing in that one family time. Power sia. I scolded these few boys so badly, they kenna punish by their teacher. Because of them, I managed to lecture all those gina kia on some random stuff like respect and something. After that was the Night.

Damn tiring, the night. Chori-chori ah, chicken dance and mass dance all. Sibeh tiring. But not bad lah, overall. Much better than SSS. But highlight of the night was, a girl who injured herself. I don't know if she jump or what, but she kenna her ankle. Then me and jocelyn brought her to the medical room which is like SUPER FAR from the stadium. But it was very cool lah, the girl was super cute. Cause it was like, damn dark. If didn't have torchlight, seriously super dark and kinda scary. I know cause I had to walk back there on my own after leaving the girl in the med room -.- But she was damn cute. At first she was super scared cause it was dark, then after me and jocelyn kept talking to her, she was like, "现在不怕了" or something like that, because she had "帅哥得彦" and "美女姐姐" to accompany her. At first she was very shy, then after that she will laugh and smile, very cute. Highlight of the Qiushi night for me.

And that was practically the end of our orientation programme for them. There was e-web the next morning, but only for the 112 leaders and the PC. We were doing our own one, so I didn't manage to hear what was said :/ But it was pretty good lah, from the atmosphere. Then at night, they planned a party for us, with cake and drinks and performance somemore. Very sweet of them. Then we debriefed at LN and I had to smuggle my letters to my PC out to them. Don't know why, they didn't allow us to meet our PC after debrief, but I managed to. The letters for my PC, 6 of them, I had to write using torchlight from like 12am to 3am after the Qiushi night. I'm not sure how long I spent writing my letters to them, but my hand almost cramped man. Super tiring. Like very romantic like that, write letter using torchlight. But tiring lah, during e-web I was super sleepy. And the next morning, we left.

It was super rushed lah, if we had more time it would have been much better. But we had to leave by like... 8 or something? And that was where I cried for the second time. Because it's hard to imagine that we'll see them again, and almost impossible for the 20 of us to meet the 28 of them ever again. The goodbyes were very difficult. Photos, giving them our jackets, and our last words. It's hard to describe the emotions. Cause these were the kids that we trained for 7 days. Really train them and take care of them, and try our best to make them into leaders. And the hope that I did not fail them. But so little time, maybe I could have done more, talked to them more. And that was the last chance we had, while waiting for our bus to arrive. And it's hard to describe the sense of loss, that comes from leaving behind the kids that you have watched grow so much within 7 days. Theirs was an impossible mission, to plan an orientation for 700 people. But they succeeded, and more. It was humbling, because they were excellent and amazing people, all 28 of them. The fervor with which they helped us with whatever they could, with which they learned whatever they could. There's always the regret that maybe I could have done more, for these amazing kids.

It's an experience, being looked up to. Because these people, were wholly dependent on us. They looked to us for advice, support, encouragement. Whenever they are lost or clueless they turn to us. The respect they have for us, is overwhelming and yes, very humbling. Mentorship is a very valuable thing. To have the 6 of my family PCs looking to me for guidance and help, is invaluable.

陈婷 - Out of all of them under my care, she is the one I was most worried about. She was always alone leading her class as Yu Yang had admin work always. She was so timid and shy, I feared for her. I had to pay special attention to her class always. She told me, everytime she saw me she would be afraid, because it usually meant I had more instructions for her. I am very sorry that my presence meant that. I hope she does fine, and she smiles more and worries less. She promised me to. She looks like a mouse.

雨旸 - He could not spend much time with the family, caught up with admin stuff. I know how much he would have wanted to be with his class, but cannot because he has to take attendance and stuff. He said, once when he was at our family spot doing admin stuff, he couldn't help but to scold some boys who were playing behind, and even made them do push-ups. I felt bad when I heard that, it meant that I wasn't doing my job well, and he had to help me when it wasn't his job to do so. He also said on MSN, that he couldn't bear to go offline because he was talking to us. How very sweet of him. I promised him we'll talk again.

沈易 - He is a very nice boy. He looks like some noob nerd in his specs, but he's very nice. He always keng from his log so that he could be with the family. He is also the dude who I almost got injured because I pulled him up on the table with me. He thanked me in his letter, for giving him encouragement. I wonder if I thanked him for his support? He says he doesn't have time to write much in his letter, and I believe him. I know that they wrote their letters to me at night too, after I gave mine to them. I did not realize that fact until I read their letters on the plane, that they too, sacrificed their sleep to write their letters to me. How very stupid of me. Wish I had the chance to thank him, and the others.

吴逸 - She's the emcee. No, I have never blamed her for not being with us. In fact, I failed in giving her the support that she needs. Being an emcee is not easy, what did I have for her but my drink, sweet and lollipop. Oh. I gave those to her late, after all her emcee-ing duties were done. Stupid. She wrote a long letter for me and razak, and folded it intricately into a heart shape. It was great to see english words. "I LOVE YOU, I MISS YOU" That summarizes everything into 6 words. I'll have to tell her I reciprocate those feelings.

吕歆 - This one's the games I/C. I wish I knew the names of the other gamers. It amazes me that I can hardly match any of their names to their faces, except for her. They remember all of us. She's very bubbly, it's hard to imagine what she must have gone through for her to weep during the emo session. The kind of hardship, I must respect her for that. She came up with the treasure hunt game, which is probably better than any of my ideas in the few months leading to the trip. I could probably learn alot from her. She wrote a letter to some of us, but it got lost, unfortunately. Wish I had more to remember her by.

平帆 - She put in her heart and soul, and voice into the camp. By the second day, she could hardly speak. She was hoarse throughout, and needed someone to help her speak out loud. She could only whisper, loudly. It was my fault, no doubt. Up on the stage, not helping the leaders out. She had to shout to control the crowd, which meant that I sucked big time. Also, I kept asking her to substitute me on the table, when I was sick of leading the crowd. I'm really sorry that I neglected her health and her throat deteriorated. She bears no grudges against me, and is effusive in her praise of me in her letter. That just amazes me, and I truly thank her.

There were others, but I know not their names, only their faces. And in time, even their faces will fade. But yeah, they have been amazing, and made my trip amazing. Thanks also to JJ people, of course. Chris, jacelyn, yue yin, razak from the games comm. Others for advice or companionship.

I think it's quite amazing, that 20 of us went there and made a difference, an impact on 700 people. And here I shall end my post on my china trip. And sleep. It's 4.45 already, shet. Nighto.